May 31, 2005

The one with walking away

Posted by Hello

I was excited when I went home. I can rest at last. I woke up feeling the rush of doing all the things I had in mind. I started with a great dinner, some fresh air outside and then I plunged in cyber world. Only to be crushed when I saw his name once again on my screen.

I rememberthe last time I saw him...

We were having fun that day. I almost thought it's perfect after going through traffic and one hell of a day's work. It was worth it, no regrets. Suddenly, the mood shifted. He was listening as he always does best. It was just different. He was staring at me as if he's thinking of something far away.

I got disturbed by a call. Before I can even hung up on the caller, he walked away. He left me there. No, he deserted me. I tried to pose my most cheerful smile like nothing happened and it's the most normal thing to do on earth.

What he didn't know is that when I turned my back on him, I was crying inside. Behind all the laughter and the smile when I was with him was a fluke...because it was exactly the opposite of what I'm feeling inside. Seeing that he no longer has any idea of who I really am after all these years that we've been good friends made me realize that I didn't lose him that day.

I've lost the guy long ago. Walking away is just the drawing of the curtains.

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