The one with 2015

Jump until you run out of breath.

Pockets are filled with coins jingling with every step.

Loud sounds of fireworks and smoke-filled air wafted in the house like it will never end.

Those were memories of spending New Year that comes to mind when midnight strikes in the Philippines. 

It seems like centuries ago at the moment.

Time really flew so fast that today my mind decided to put it all down in writing.

How was 2015?

It was a blur.

~Joined a run for a cause called Run for Hope - an amazing feeling and an honor to run with all the survivors and those who are still undergoing their battles but held every breath to finish the run.

~Finally faced him after the longest time twice and came back stronger than before. Yes, I'm proud to say that I am in the process of getting over him and wishing he'll find the love of his life in God's time.

~1st time to join a serious 10k turned into 11.4k trail run due to miscalculation of the organizers. It turned out into an awesome experience with colleagues who helped me finish the race on time. I never hated rocks as much as that time. Oh well, I learned to appreciate water even more so kudos to that!

~A colleague who happened to be my schoolmate and friend left our company & came back. For some cosmic reason, we always bump into one another outside the office. He's a great friend and it's nice to see a familiar face again. 

~Moved to a place near the mountains outside the city with an ex-colleague from Manila when my sister gave birth. Sister moved with me after giving birth and the place is looking more and more charming each day. 

~My sister gave birth to an adorable little angel. Tons of coffee moments to brainstorm his name. He's now 9 months! How's that for time flies?

~My century-old friend finally found the love of her life, got engaged & married all in the same year! Thank you God for an answered prayer! 

~I got to add another certificate on my resume after pushing myself to study some more. All thanks to determination born out of boredom. 

~My college friend & I finally met after more than a decade and it felt like nothing had changed except our location. 

~A female cousin from my Mom's side who is also working here became even more close to my sister and I although it was due to some unfortunate events...my grandfather and her mother (my aunt) passed away. The pain was unbearable. The news was delivered to me at around 2 am while I was at work both times with only a few weeks apart. Those months were the longest I ever experienced in this lifetime. They're both in God's hands now and will remain in our hearts forever.

~I am still working in the same company for over 3 years. It's a first. (The longest I've been with one was 2 years and 3 months.) Commitment is truly a struggle. 

~My Dad got a better job back home and he no longer had to stay out of the country.

~Our adopted sister finally became more serious in studying and became a Dean's Lister. Miracles do happen.

More stories happened in the last year and if I have to put them all in writing I might end up skipping sleep so I'll end it for now. 

Life is different every day. All of us go through the motions like a routine. 

Until something hits us hard. It makes us stumble, fall and crumble. 

With all the heartaches, lessons are learned and values are earned.

Whatever happens, we choose each day to live. 

So let's all start this year fresh. Renewed. Hopeful. Wiser.

And above all, faithful. Because faith is the only thing that can see through the blur. 

The one with the rabbit

A rabbit goes into the hole then it flees
It hops and crawls its way up a tree
It stares into the unknown waiting for the rain
That makes its heart beat as though under a flame
To reveal its secret when the time has come
The trees howl and the breeze shouts again
The rabbit falls from the tree and tumbles into a cliff
A booming voice asked "are you free?"
Its ears went up then ran to the shore
Waves kept hugging the sand like an open door
With cold feet and sniffles, the rabbit found a cave
The darkness felt like a blanket and the rabbit felt safe. 

The one with countdown

In the next 2 months I will hit the age of my grand exit in the calendar. Hooray! Or not.

Big deal. Not exactly. 

For me? It's more of a countdown to all the accomplishments I had as an individual. When I say accomplishments - I am not referring to certificates, medals and the likes. Give me a break. 

I meant personal goals that I accomplished. It is more in the line of achieving my own list of things to do before I turn 31.

Since I am running out of time, I'll come up with my top 10 and post them in 2 months to see if I did even half of it.

Some of what I have in mind are very simple tasks which I have never done in my 30 years of existence. I want to correct them or at least give justice to the time I spent living on this planet with such selfish purposes.

I hope to be of service to others in my own little ways and I'll start with that. 

Here's to the me - version 30.0! It has a nasty taste on my tongue. 

Alright- let's make it version 2.0. 

Be back in 2 months with the update! :)

The one with New Year

Boom. There I was at 9 PM sitting on the couch, not knowing where to go: to my sister's friend's house to celebrate it with a family I hardly know or to join my friends in the NY's Eve countdown in front of Marina Bay Sands with the rest of mankind. Well, this was a first for me- no plans at all for New Year's eve.

I initially imagined spending it at work but my overly kind boss let me go home earlier than expected. He even bought me a gift which was a first since I've been with the company for more than a year and I didn't get any present from him on any occasion. With neverending advices and suggestions (like a father will say to his niece), he let me get out of the cab unscathed from his innuendos of me getting married by this age (30-ouch!). Yes, I am of age- but my brain seemed to contradict every second I hear the TH in thirty.

I mean cut the crap. All of us get to this age and all of us deserve to be given the chance to decide whether to go through with marriage or not. I told him several times-marriage is not for everyone. I may want to in the near future but I don't want to be pushed into it simply because almost everyone I know has a baby! 

Anyway, I went through the whole ordeal of dragging my butt in the overly crowded MBS to meet friends who also want to celebrate New Year outside their homes. I must admit it was a great idea to welcome New Year that way instead of moping around at home waiting for my sister to arrive and end up watching some sad movie or show online while crying for the passing of my 2013. The TH year. Uughh.

We stayed there for an hour or so while listening to different bands and artists singing songs from various languages that I had to drink a beer to cool me down. Finally, the fireworks started and I was in awe of all the lights flashing and burning the sky like a sign that this year will be unique among the rest. 

It brought memories of the last New Years I spent since childhood. Me sitting on the bed, jotting down some NY's resolution on my diary then running down the stairs 10 minutes before NY to join my family in the fireworks display activities in front of our home. 

I wanted to hug someone that night and I received cheek-kisses from friends. Well, it was more than I expected and surely compensated the no-hug evening. I invited them over because I didn't feel like being alone on the first day of the year. We watched different New Years Eve being celebrated all over the world and then chatted some more over Bacardi before they left.

I used to think that being with my family doing the usual activities before New Year is a pain because I cannot be with friends to do something fun.I never knew that I'll miss all those scheduled activities right before New Year like the slicing of pineapples for the fruit salad, the non-stop taste tests of all the food being cooked by my nanny since I was 5, my Dad and me watching action movies while waiting for 11 PM, my Mom asking me to put coins in my pockets before it hits 12 and the long hours chatting while making chicken strips for Bihon (noodles). 

I missed all of those activities that this New Year felt hollow to me although my friends are like family away from home. I miss the moments that we are together and sometimes I can't help but feel like I'm missing out on a lot like what my Boss said. Boom.